The Sheepdog, Grace and the Midnight Cat
When I was little, my mother and I used to read this book about a midnight cat. It was called John Brown, Rose and the Midnight Cat. It’s a small children’s book about an old lady who lives alone with a sheepdog called John Brown.
The dog, John Brown, feels like he can take care of her without any help from the cat. When I looked up the story tonight, I recalled the plot of the story with a simple phrase, “Just the Two of Us”.
The story is about how John Brown and Rose can get along just swell, just the two of them.
For those who know me very well, I’m a prolific planner. If you met me or befriended me, you would probably think I am spontaneous and a fly by the wing of my seat - kind of gal - but I am someone who needs structure and certainty to allow for spontaneity.
There are parts of my mind that are like the Old English Sheepdog John Brown. They seem to think they know what’s right for me.
Graduate 2024
Either pursue a career in photography or find a post-graduate program
Live close to the city
Have good habits (I like these)
Most likely stick around in Australia in 2025 (Brisbane or Sydney)
Niche photography business - “because if you’re serving everyone, you’re serving no one”
Pick between pursuing a weekly job with certainty or continuing with the photography route
Find boundaries and stick to them with said photography job
Have you zoned out yet?
Well, the John Brown part of my mind knows that if I stick to these things - I should do well. I’ve been putting this pressure on myself to make sure I figure it all out either by the end of 2024 or by the time I turn 25. I’m reaching an age where I am no longer a kid and I need to make some tough choices: to or to not pursue the dream?
In the book, the midnight cat begins to reveal itself and John Brown becomes envious. He struggles to cope with Rosie’s care for the outdoor cat.
For me, my midnight cat would be my why, my values, my purpose, my impact. It’s this innate curiosity for the greater sustenance of life.
I’ve been doing this odd thing lately where I’ve been changing my Instagram grid around a lot. For me, it acts as a visual moodboard for what I want to picture for myself. What is the one thing I want to tell the world that I do? It has changed a frustrating amount of times.
Why? Why do I do what I do?
I create because I think art allows you to have a beautiful footprint of a legacy on the world
I create art because it allows me to help people to see themselves in a new way
Okay these answers were kind of lame so I asked ChatGPT to ask me questions to help me figure it out and here’s what I got. I am going to be as honest and transparent as I have the courage to be.
Question 1: What would you do even if you weren't paid for it? This helps identify your true interests and passions, beyond monetary incentives.
If I wasn’t doing what I was doing right now and hadn’t built what I had built I think I would try one of the following things:
I think I would try my guns as building a boudoir studio that specialised in capturing the female form. I would help women to revolutionise the way they see themselves through my photography. I would do this by taking portraits of women and infusing them with good energy through our session. I would learn more about posing and lighting so I could create world-class photos.
I would start a podcast where I could just spend all of my time interviewing other photography business owners. It would be an educational platform where I just get to sit down and get curious about how other creative entrepreneurs have been successful.
I started writing a few chapters of this book a few years ago that is a blend of my roots, history, fears and dreams. It paints a picture of a dystopia future world. If I had time, I think I’d spend more of it exploring that. I’m always surprised when I tell people about it and they want to learn more.
I think I would just spend more time photographing my family because they’re so special to me. I think the ability to give that gift back that I’ve mastered - or am at least in the process of mastering - would be a really beautiful thing. I only took out my camera occasionally when my grandparents were alive and the photos I took of them are so special to me.
I think I would try to create a course for photographers. Quite a few people have asked me how to take pictures and I think they would appreciate getting some of my practical shortcuts on how to take beautiful photographs and go pro.
I’d really love to be surrounded by a team. Being an entrepreneur can be pretty isolating so having more people on board to work on a vision and a dream together would be really cool.
I think I feel like I am ready to step back as a head photographer and step into a managerial role where I lead the vision and allow my team to run with the horses.
I think I could work in a yoga studio - just so I could be surrounded by people who really want to take care of their bodies. I’m also open to consultancy work because I think being an entrepreneur gives you such a broad range of skills and keeps you super engaged.
I’d do more horse riding lessons and build my confidence when I canter. I’d keep going on long podcast walks with my beautiful golden retriever Scotchie.
If I lived in Europe, I would go to all the fashion weeks just to photograph all of the beautiful haute couture.
Question Two: How do you want to be remembered? Contemplate the legacy you wish to leave, as it can guide your actions and choices.
I want to be remembered through the art on the walls. I’d love to do an exhibition someday. If I ever write, perhaps it’s a thought I leave in someone’s mind.
Question Three: What problems in the world do you feel compelled to solve? This can reveal your deeper concerns and the areas where you feel most motivated to make a difference.
I deeply feel how I was treated when I first became a photographer. I was young, naive and easy to take advantage of. I wish I could help people so they never have to go through what I went through in an industry that allows the big players to profit off taking advantage of young creatives that don’t know any better.
The climate crisis is the issue of our generation. A lot of attention focuses on the effects it will have on the environment and seems to overlook the risk of losing culturally significant sites. The loss of our heritage.
I’m bored of our self-obsessed society. I’m bored of the self-idolising videos and how we worship ourselves for the aesthetic things in life. I am not compelled to solve it.
Question Four: What activities make you lose track of time? Activities that cause you to enter a state of 'flow' often align with your intrinsic motivations and passions.
I lose track of time when I journal
When I meditate, I like it when I get passed the “bored” and “why am I doing this minutes” where I can access my imagination and growing self.
When I go on a walk, put on a podcast and get lost in my own thoughts
When I bake - in the kitchen
When I am inspired by something and want to figure out how to capture it
When I am working on a website for my business
When I am strategising for my business
When I get to write
When I am conversing with someone
When I get to help someone with their business
Question Five: Who do you admire and why? The qualities you admire in others can reflect the values and aspirations you hold for yourself.
I admire my mother. She created a veterinary business in the 199os to provide for our family when my dad got sick. She wanted to be a stay-at-home mum but she went from veterinarian to superhero entrepreneur. Through her practice, she’s been able to create a great place to work and a successful enterprise in a very difficult industry. Through her work, she created a community of Groodle-owners who through their work have raised over half-a-million dollars for charity and she’s now working with Vets across Australia to prevent the worst case climate change scenario. Pretty cool.
I’m inspired by my second mum who is affectionately called ‘Epic Aunty’. She did an incredible job helping to support my best friend through a really difficult time and then went on to do tertiary studies in her 50s and help people.
I’m inspired by my Grandmother and Grandfather. My Grandmother and Grandfather were this role model couple for me my whole life. They immigrated from the Netherlands to Australia in the 1960s and spent time living in Papua New Guinea. They kept our family together, helped us to have an extended family that feels harmonious and connected and left an amazing imprint on their community at home and abroad.
In this I can see:
Selflessness
Creation
Community
Connection
Perseverance
Perhaps not being able to see the final goal but being committed to the purpose nonetheless
Question Six: What would your ideal day look like? Envisioning your perfect day can uncover what truly matters to you in your personal and professional life.
In my ideal day, I wake up between 7:00 am and 9:00am. I get the whole morning to myself to work out, meditate, have my matcha, have time off of my phone and have time with my subconscious mind before it gets swamped with digital cracked up dopamine from my phone.
I would then work from 9:30 am until 4 / 5 pm. I would have a nutritious lunch full of greens and protein so that my glucose is balanced throughout the day.
In my work day I get to:
Strategise
Work with a team
Come up with a new concept for a shoot
Perfect our customer experience
Focus on making our customers feel great and ensuring the team is happy working where they are
I would then have dinner around 7:00pm. In my ideal day, I have a nice relaxing bath.
Then around 9:30pm I put my phone away and start getting ready for bed. I have a kindle ready to go with a great book, do a good meditation and fall asleep by 10:30pm / 11:00pm.
How do you define success for yourself? Personal definitions of success can be very telling of what you value most in life.
I am successful when:
I wake up and see the sun and am rested in the morning
I have worked out and meditated for the day
I’ve hit a new PB with my business
When I know it’s possible for me to keep doing what I’m doing as an entrepreneur
I know I am successful when I have the right habits in place and therefore I don’t need to worry about minutia things throughout the day
What are my values?
I value making people feel good through the work I do
I value creating beautiful art I am proud of
I value having freedom and flexibility
What is the impact I want to have?
I want to be able to create heirloom art that goes on the wall that a family or individual can be proud of
I want to be able to create art that brings people together and connects them
What is my purpose that wakes me up every day?
I am motivated by the knowledge that despite being an artist, I am creating a future for myself that I will be able to find certainty and stability in.
I am motivated by being the person who managed to do the thing people don’t always take seriously. In this process, I feel like I’m paving a way for future artists to make their dreams possible.
So there it is. My John Brown, my midnight cat and little ‘ol me.
